Adrienne onboard

Here I am, writing in Tanner's blog almost as if I am insinuating myself into his brain! Now my thoughts are your thoughts, m'dear, and there ain't nothing you can do about it.
Spent more time in bed this morning resetting my alarm than I did sleeping. The dozing off was continual until I had a dream in which Tanner told me he'd made out with that girl who asked him out on a date a few days ago.
Made out. That's not the right term for this, too positive. He could make out with me (and does!) but with another girl it would be...let's just call it Lip Mashing and Grinding.
But that didn't really happen so let's not dwell.
The sun is far too bright today, I step outside and the sun can see the dirt beneath my fingernails, my dry cracked lips sucking on that cigarette because I Am An Addict. I am sending myself off into this sunny whirlpool of Feminine wiles and temper tantrums, heading south and already I'm throwing a fit in my mind.
I begin to think, perhaps the only way for a person to ever feel powerful in this world is to acknowledge to oneself that one has the ability to inflict serious pain onto others.
Would feeling powerful diminish the need to rage at others?
My anthropomorphized sun is rage. It bathes me in warmth, and just when I'm rolling around naked, it tears me apart. Others can SEE you, it tells me. Others can see you, are you prepared for that possibility?